I've been away awhile but I am back. I just flew in from Chicago.
And boy are my arms tired.
STUPID!!
Seriously. Uhhh...I had the Swine Flu!! Yeah... YEAH! And I got it directly from some pigs (swine). See, it happened like this:
"There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, 'Father, give me my share of the estate.' So he divided his property between them. "Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country and there squandered his wealth in wild living. After he had spent everything, there was a severe famine in that whole country, and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country, who sent him to his fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. "When he came to his senses, he said, 'How many of my father's hired men have food to spare, and here I am starving to death! I will set out and go back to my father and say to him: Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son; make me like one of your hired men.' So he got up and went to his father. "But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him; he ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. "The son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' "But the father said to his servants, 'Quick! Bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' So they began to celebrate. "Meanwhile, the older son was in the field. When he came near the house, he heard music and dancing. So he called one of the servants and asked him what was going on. 'Your brother has come,' he replied, 'and your father has killed the fattened calf because he has him back safe and sound.' "The older brother became angry and refused to go in. So his father went out and pleaded with him. But he answered his father, 'Look! All these years I've been slaving for you and never disobeyed your orders. Yet you never gave me even a young goat so I could celebrate with my friends. But when this son of yours who has squandered your property with prostitutes comes home, you kill the fattened calf for him!' " 'My son,' the father said, 'you are always with me, and everything I have is yours. But we had to celebrate and be glad, because this brother of yours was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found.' "
Ok. Ok. I didn't really have swine flu but I am always looking for a way to throw some scripture atcha, baby. By the way, the swine flu epidemic you have been reading so much about lately has thus far killed, I think, about 8 people in the U. S. of A. Did you know that the normal flu bug that comes around every year kills, on average, about 36,000 Americans every year? Am I missing something? I hope that the media and our government doesn't end up like the boy who cried wolf and when the BIG ONE really does hit, no one will take precautions. Just in case, my boss and I have been hording flu masks at work. You know, these things:
It will only cost you $4,000.00.....each, baby.
While I have been away, Cup A Joe has still been visited alot. Weird. Alot of the images and photos I have put up over the last 2 years have been Googled alot so that Cup A Joe has been visited from all over the world. I have put up pictures of Jesus Christ, John Travolta, C.S. Lewis, Van Halen, Snoop Dogg, etc. A lot of very famous people but do you know which image has been Googled the most? This one:
And it ain't even close. I still get between 5 and 15 Googles for that image every day. Here is a short list of some of the places where the people lived that have visited us:
- Cambridge, Massachuseets (Home of Harvard University)
- London, England
- Pleasonton, California
- Jerome, Idaho
- Singapore (Asia)
- Anchorage, Alaska
- Belgium
-
Pamplona, Spain
How weird is this? It's got my head all screwed up. The Apocalypse can't be far away.
Anyhoodles, as I am prone to do, I had an imaginary conversation with one of these dudes, the guy from Singapore. I'll call him Achmed:
Me: So, Achmed. I see where you visited Cup A Joe. That's very cool but can I ask a question; Why Arnold Horshack?
Achmed: OOO!! OOO!! Mr. Kotter!! Mr. Kotter! Me laugh everytime I think of he. All time I think of he. We worship him in my country.
Me: Ok. Well, is there anything else I can put on the blog for you?
Achmed: Ooohh Jes! Jes you can. Freddie "Boom Boom" Washington. You know he, jes? Can you put picture up?
Me: Well Achmed, JES! Jes I can. In fact, I'll do better than that:
Me: There ya' go Achmed. Hope that makes you happy. And Achmed?
Achmed: Jes?
Me: Up your nose with a rubber hose.
And one last thing that is both very sad and funny but I feel I must share it with you:
He was supposed to breath in it. It's a breathalyzer test to see if you are legally drunk. I breathed in one of those once and it melted.
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